Bank Holiday

I am mourning the passing of the last UK bank holiday till august. Going to work everyday leaves you with a strange joy when you get an extra day of weekend… a day which is the precious gift of society to me.

Thanks society! You’re the best.

We can use the day or waste it at our leisure. For many it is a time to enjoy some extra time with the family; for others an opportunity to sleep off a particularly bad hangover. For me something sinister happens in my brain which makes me think things like: Hey lets sit in the same place for a few hours! Quick, find and watch all of season two of prison break right stat now!

And so my extra day off has me locked in a dim room, watching Michael Schofield and friends getting arrested twice an episode, beaten up, escaping and generally looking pissed off all the time. Brilliant.

Here is a picture of me wasting my time off:

Evening smacks me round the face and I feel slightly saddened that I hadn’t created some masterpiece, or started work on that thing (I’m not sure what it is but am sure I have the ability to come up with) which will make me a bucket load of cash. What was that thing again? oh well forget it… pasta time!

On the upside I found out about two new bands which I will definitely be buying more of the hourly radio and the long winters. Got me back into indy slightly – wahey

On second thought it totally wasn’t wasted time because now I know how to escape from prison and you don’t. In fact I have seen over 4 things about escaping from jail so Iam pretty much an expert at it now.

Humerous Shop Names

I was recently reminded of a great Mitchell and Webb sketch which features a meeting of people setting up a new laundromat business – trying to decide on a name for their shop, and come up with the name ‘touching cloth‘. Of course then they soon have an inkling that it it could have a different meaning in a sort of hilariously perplexed way which they carry off so well.

Also, doing a little research of my own it would seem that the only people that attempt to insert humor into the names of their shop end up using some deadful pun or other:

It would seem the ruder the phrase – the more hilarious it becomes when you think about an actual shop which might sell such things. For example suppliers of rack mounts for servers and other storage, call your shop ‘great rack’. Glass blowers: ‘blow job’. The list is endless.

I suppose the idea is that your potential customer will be bent double with laughter – and just have to see the merchandise that a shop with such a hilarious title has to offer. Then they will rush off to tell everyone they know how witty and fun the shop is they just saw… rather than think: what a tacky, gimicky name let’s hate anyone that even looks at that shop from now on – and then go somewhere proper that doesn’t look like it’s run by middle aged humorless fuckwits.

Lets hope that is the case.

Thinking about it I guess I am hoping for a bit much that the name of a shop will invoke such an extreme emotional response in anyone. I used to live near a fish and chip shop called the codfather and the best response that I recieved from anyone on hearing the name would be a small ‘heh’; which is the conversational equivalent of ‘I couldn’t care less’

Beaches and a sophisticated graph

I wanted to briefly write about beaches, which I have decided are quite nice. I don’t think I have developed enough maturity to just sit and bask in the niceness… For example on a sandy beach I will be propted to dig, or bury parts of myself . On a stony beach it is mandatory to chuck stones at any non-beach related object in sight (assuming it is not other people). I even did one of those trendy graphs to explain this, in case my words had for some reason been written in a way only comprehensable to myself:

I should be some high-flying marketing consultant with graph creating abilities like that

Comic

I know this is an old joke but I wanted to do a strip for it :)