Obama Facts

I keep finding sites in my cyber travels that inform me of various facts about Mr Barack Obama. Well given the matter some extensive research I am now able to offer you, the streetwise reader with this (abridged) list of 10 Obama facts that are 100% OF FACT

all the FACTS are definitely guaranteed, and will make you the life and soul of any party. As long as the people you tell them to are particularly dim, or are from Bristol or something.

1. Obama’s most prize possession is his signed Christopher Eccleston photograph, which he keeps under his pillow every night

2. Obama’s favourite band is Iron Maiden, he owns all of their albums

3. Obama boasts a collection of 209 Doctor Who figurines, all of Christopher Eccleston. His obsession with Eccleston stretches to having posters in the Oval office of 28 days later and Shallow Grave; in which Eccelston boasts lead roles.

4. To date Obama’s greatest achievement since gaining office is having introduced America’s only website: Red hot XXX Barack action. He is known to be pleased with the alliteration in the name

5. Barack Obama is a huge fan of the Star Wars franchise and hopes to retire to Endor and become an ewok

6. Obama’s meteoric rise in politic is thanks to earning early fame with his number one smash: I walk the line. He spent many years battling drug abuse, and fighting depression from having neglected to save his brother from sawing himself in half in a lumber yard; an accident for which his father still hasn’t forgiven him.

7. Obama controversially prefers vanilla ice-cream over chocolate

8. Obama has tried most drugs, and claims that his favourite is cocaine because of its notorious ‘buzz’

9. When running for president Barack became extremely nervous and ate only Mexican food. He gained over 250 pounds (18 stone) due to his unhealthy eating habits. Once learning of his victory he immediately scheduled liposuction surgery to appear healthy to the press.

10. Obama is often mistakenly thought to come from Hawaii, in actuality he was the first man to settle the island after its discovery in 1984. He was born and raised in Tokyo